Fresh starts. Good days.

Sundays

Mondays
Tuesdays

Wednesdays

Thursdays

Fridays

Saturdays

Mornings

New years
New months
Births

Spring gardens

Travel

Returns

Flavors

New friends

Break-ups

Books

Shows

Music

Learning

Showers & baths

Clothes

Fire

Water

Earth

Air

Forgiveness

Thankfulness

Service

Sunrise

Sunset

Nightfall

Arrivals

Departures

Promotions

Exercise: Write down something that means a fresh start for you

OK is OK enough

A few years ago I told someone that I once had a decade that was only OK and that it was the best I could ask for.

I told them that I was thankful that it was ok though.  OK was the best it could be because OK was the best I could be.

There are times when OK will be the best that can be offered.  You may do your very best or the world may be what it is and it is only OK.

Doing your best is doing your best even when it's only OK

Today might be a good day because it was OK.

Today might be a good day because you were OK.

That is OK.

Exercise: What was that last thing you did in which OK was the best you could offer?

Your mission, should you choose to accept it:

Organizations often have "Missions Statements," "Vision Statements," and "Core Values" posted somewhere where their members, customers, or visitors can see them.

A mission statement describes what the organization is for; what its purpose is: "What are we doing?".  The vision statement describes how the organization benefits the community it belongs to: "Why are we here?"

The core values offer a guide on how they are going to get where they want.

Oftentimes missions, visions, and values are just words to make sure that human resource or marketing boxes are checked.

When making today a good day,  it's valuable to have a mission, vision, and values and to make sure that you are on the right track by checking them regularly.

A personal mission may be very specific or general: "I want to buy a thing of value," "I want to be a better friend," "I want to be a good cook," "I want to be more healthy."  Why we want those things will inform our vision and who we are make up our core values.

When they aren't defined, it's difficult know know how we're doing day-to-day.  It's possible to have multiple missions statements.  It's possible for a mission to change over time.

Exercise: Write down a Mission Statement and a Vision Statement.  Put it where you can see it.  Ask yourself throughout the day/week/year if what you are doing is working towards that. 

It’s All About Scale

I have two scales I use to measure if a day is a good one.

The first scale is the "Best day/Worst day scale."

For  this scale, I first needed to identify my best day(s) ever.  The best days of my life were the days my daughters were born and the day my girlfriend agreed to be my wife.  Other things may have happened  those days but to me, they were amazingly wonderful.  I would not give  those days back for anything else.

I also needed to identify my worst day ever for this scale to have a bottom.  One hopes that this is harder to do than finding a best day.  My  worst day was the day my little sister died.  It was sudden and tragic  and I hope it remains the worst day of my life; that no day is any worse.

Once I established my range using those days, I could examine today and see where it lands.

The  chances are that today falls right around the middle.  Some days are  better or worse than average but overall, in my world, that counts as a  good day.

The second scale I use it the "Percent of the day" scale.

For  this scale,  I needed to break my day into tasks or events.  For me, I have the broad categories of  "sleeping", "going to work", "working", "time with family", "eating" and  "other free-time stuff".  That all makes up 100% of my day; 24 hours.

For  me to have a bad day, it needs to be more that 50% bad.  That means  that I have to have more than 12 hours of bad.  So many bad hours rarely  happen in one day.  Most hours for me are, at worst, only OK but many  (if not most) are good hours.

What's more, when you  start breaking your day into basic components and are mindful of the  parts that are making them less-than-good, you have the awareness to  know what has to change.

Part of making today a good  day is knowing what makes it so and that scale will have to be specific  to your needs.   Find your scale; and step on it.

Hello

I don't think that going to the movies or the theater is a very good date.  You and whoever you go with sit and watch alone: the other person, while sitting next to you, is also watching alone.  If you sat in different rows you'd have the same experience.  I do, however, think that the drinks or coffee or what-have-you after the show, when you can discuss what you both experienced, IS a good date.  The alone part is fine and can even be good, but the real joy is the sharing with someone.

What is true for a date is also good for good days.  Much of what we do is internal to ourselves; we are alone in our tasks and our thoughts and it's the interaction with others that provides a special sort of value.

Interactions with others don't always come naturally to everyone.  I have said for years that I've never met a stranger; I can walk up to anyone and make a casual friend.  I'm odd though.  For some people, connections are more difficult and they need a way to open themselves up to others.

"Hello"

"Hello" is a great way to open a conversation, a connection.  "Hello" is the first step into a larger journey with another person.  "Hello" creates a super-casual relationship that can lead to a subtle uplifting of the day or a deep friendship.  "Hello" can be magical.

Sharing who you are, sharing your time, making connections make todays good days.  Start making small connections and see how your days become better.

Accumulation

Have you ever noticed that something going wrong can almost ruin a day?
Or that a bad day can ruin a week?
And how things seem to snowball into a mess?
Bad days are like that.
It makes having a good day much harder to have.

The fact is that good days don't exist in a vacuum; they coexist with those bad days and even average days that seem to have no significance. Each single day is part of a tapestry of days that make up our lives.  The little things that make a good day hard and add to the bad day noise can be a struggle.

To combat that struggle takes some special tools and one of those tools is "active accumulation of good days".  Active accumulation of good days means that we are to specifically, overtly notice and remember the good days that have come before and add them to all the previous good days we've had.  For some people it may be enough to hold those previous good days in their mind.  For others, it may be necessary to look back into diaries or photo albums to recall the good days.  Like most tools though, the more you use them and keep them ready, the easier they are to use.

The days of our lives are going to pile up over time .  We are going to accumulate something from them.  Keep the ones you want and let the others go.

You are what you do (or "You do what you are")

Do you know the biggest factor in having a good day?

It's not what day of the week it is.  It's not the activities that occur throughout the day.

You.
You are the biggest factor.
You create the good day or you recognize the good day.  In either case it's (almost*) all about you.

The choices you make throughout the day, what you do, is who you really are.  The job you do and how you do it, the people you are with and how you interact with them, the things you chose to do are what make you you.

To have a good day people have to look at themselves and see what they are doing to make it good.  They have to find ways to overlook or overcome or avoid the things that prevent it from being good.

Having or making or recognizing a good day is all about the individual.  It's all about you.  It's about what you are doing.

If you want a good day, do good day things.
You are a good day.